Sometimes fruit comes from jelly instead of the other way around
I love my oldest son. But to say that sometimes he's a bit of, um, a challenge is putting it mildly. Often I'm pulling my hair out because I can't seem to get through his thick skull.
Earlier this week, we had PB&J for lunch. Normally I cut everyone's sandwich except his. Actually I did so that day too, but accidentally gave his sandwich to C. C had it half-gone before we realized what had happened.
G HAD A COW. He wanted me to cut off the part that C had already eaten so he could eat "his" sandwich. He didn't want to eat a cut sandwich. He slammed his chair around. Pushed the table. (It is easy to move because it sits on a Pergo floor.)
COW. COW, I TELL YOU.
I apologized for the mistake (multi-tasking leads to errors, I've noticed!), but I informed him that it was the same sandwich, just cut up. And he needed to just get over it. He was not going to get anything else to eat (well...he already had applesauce, but I wasn't going to fix him a new sandwich, and he was not allowed to fix himself a new sandwich either) simply because he was refusing to eat a CUT sandwich rather than a whole one. He said, "FINE, I'll just be hungry."
I then informed him that if he didn't eat that cut up sandwich, I would continue to cut up his sandwiches every time we ate PBJ until he DID eat a cut up sandwich. Oh then it got ugly. 
He told me he wasn't a baby who needed a cut up sandwich. I said that being a baby had nothing to do with it...I HAD MADE A MISTAKE. I hadn't cut his sandwich on purpose - I had accidentally given it to C. And actually, BIG kids wouldn't be having the cow he was having. He was ACTING like a baby.
(MEANWHILE, I'm thinking to myself, "All this over a CUT UP SANDWICH?!?!?!?!?!")
So I went on my way...he knew the consequences, and he needed to make the correct choice. A little bit later he was sitting on the couch with this awful, sick look on his face. I went and asked him for a hug. He refused to give me one. So I sat next to him and gave HIM one. I talked to him a bit more about how we need to be thankful, blah blah blah. I reminded him that he could pray about it and ask God to help him do the right thing.
I then had to go change S (phew!!!), and when I came back, he was eating his sandwich. I was calm on the outside, but inside I looked like this:
LOL! So I gave him a big hug and told him how proud I was of him making the right choice.
Then I asked him if he had felt bad in his heart, almost sick. He nodded. I asked, "Do you feel better now?" Yup. I explained that that was the Holy Spirit convicting him, and He'll do that when we're doing the wrong thing, so that we'll obey and do the right thing. I told him that it makes you feel almost sick, and it makes your heart hurt. I also told him that the Holy Spirit does it to me all the time.
But it was a good thing because it means we are growing. Sometimes growing hurts, just like the growing pains G gets in his legs. He gave me a big hug.
So I guess as it turns out I'm not the one who needs to be getting through his skull anyway. The Holy Spirit is the One who wants to get through to his heart.

TulipGirl wrote,
“So I guess as it turns out I’m not the one who needs to be getting through his skull anyway. The Holy Spirit is the One who wants to get through to his heart.”
Beautifully said.
Link | March 17th, 2006 at 9:53 pm
razorbackmama wrote,
Thanks TG!
Link | March 17th, 2006 at 10:20 pm
Laymond's Blog wrote,
You are a great mama !
Link | March 18th, 2006 at 6:31 am
Princess Ruby wrote,
Wow, what a great example of parenting the right way! Thanks for sharing! Sometimes- make that oftentimes- it is hard to do the right thing, whether an adult or child.
Link | March 18th, 2006 at 4:42 pm
razorbackmama wrote,
Ya know Laymond and PR, there are days when I think, “Oh Lord, why did you give this sweet boy a mama like ME????? He needs so much better.” And then there are times like this when the Lord lets me know that although it doesn’t feel like it, I’m on the right track, there IS hope for my son (LOL), and I am the perfect mom that He chose for my son.
I definitely can’t take any credit though…I have had some painful lessons along this parenting journey. I know there will be more to come, too. I just pray that I would be listening to the Holy Spirit’s voice rather than some eartly parenting guru whenever a situation arises.
Link | March 18th, 2006 at 5:02 pm
Anne wrote,
That’s so encouraging!! We’ve had a couple of things like that happen around here with Em the last couple of months.
It would be neat to read about the parenting lessons you’ve learned as I’m still learning lots of my own!
Link | March 19th, 2006 at 7:52 pm
Hannah Im wrote,
What a great story! Very encouraging.
Link | March 21st, 2006 at 4:51 pm
Darlene wrote,
I’m glad that he followed his concience, it’s when we ignore it that it gets seared with a hot iron.
I really like the way you handled it–you did good!
Link | March 24th, 2006 at 7:45 am
Serena wrote,
That was great and encouraging to this mom who has a 12 year old son like yours. It just helps to know that it is my son and not me when I read about other children acting the same way. It is amazing the things they will have a hissy fit over! I think you were very wise in how you handled it and this old mom learned some good things from you.
Love and shalom,
Serena
Link | April 2nd, 2006 at 9:02 pm