Chapter 17 is my favorite chapter of this book.

Titus 2:4-5:"That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children...."

Page 177:

The most important thing a mother will do for her children is to create an atmosphere of peace and joy by deeply loving their Daddy and being satisfied with life.

and page 178:

How do you love your children? Let these 75 homeschooled kids [that were surveyed] lead you to the important truth: Love their daddy. Honor their daddy. Obey their daddy. Forgive their daddy.

So true. It's essential to my relationship with my children that I have a right relationship with my husband. My children must know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I love and respect my husband. If I am not a good wife, I am not a good mother either. (And the same goes for the husband. I have known many a father ruin his relationship with his children because he didn't treat his wife as the Bible commands him to.)

Mrs. Pearl shares a letter from a woman who, IMO, is so typical of a Christian woman in today's society. (Although, to be fair, I'm running into more and more women who are breaking free from the world's lies - yay!) This woman is a mother of 5 children who go to a Christian school. She is stressed out because she does not have a close female friend to share house duties with. (How much housework could there be with her home by herself during the day??? Anyway....)

My biggest need is for help physically in caring for the housework and someone to sit in quiet worship with me. I need at least 4 hours per week of meditation time, self-actualization time.

I'm sorry, but SPARE ME. That is a bunch of hooey. And apparently Mrs. Pearl agrees:

Your divine calling is to serve your family. True worship of God is not dependent upon other people or special circumstances, nor does it require a time of meditation. The Spirit of God is present when you wash the dishes or pick up the dirty clothes, and he is there while you prepare meals for your family in the evening. *snip* Your seeking of "self-actualization" in the name of spirituality is a mixture of foolish psychology and emotional insecurity.

James 1:27 says:

External religious worship [religion as it is expressed in outward acts] that is pure and unblemished in the sight of God the Father is this: to visit and help and care for the orphans and widows in their affliction and need, and to keep oneself unspotted and uncontaminated from the world.

So what is "religion?" It isn't 4 hours of meditation time. It's serving your family

by tying your little one's shoe strings, reading a book to your toddler, telling a simple Bible story to the whole gang, and making sweet love with your husband.

Mrs. Pearl discusses how essential it is that we train our children. And by "train" I don't necessarily mean "discipline" (though of course we need to do that too!). What Mrs. Pearl is referring to on pp. 182-184 is "showing them how to" do different things. It's showing them what life is all about.

Some mothers treat their children as I treat my cows. I make sure they have good things to eat, clean water, and a place to exercise. If they show any signs of sickness, I attend to them immediately. This is good for cows, but if you raise kids like that, you're going to have a brood of little dummies. Unlike your care of the cows, the training of your children is the deepest expression of your love for them.

Training children means you involve them in your life and in your duties. And you get involved in THEIR lives.

She also discusses how vital it is that mamas are home with their children. Page 184:

Just because you happen to be the birth mother of a child does not make you THE mama of that child. If you hurriedly get up in the morning and rush your little one off for someone else to dry his tears, feed him lunch, and read him a book, please do not call yourself his mama.

Unfortunately this is all too common today. I know that there are situations in which a mother MUST work and have her child in some sort of day care, but I'd be willing to bet that those women would agree (if they are being honest) that they aren't their children's primary influences. But married, CHRISTIAN women are shipping their children off to "adoptive" mothers every day! I'm not going to say a woman is "in sin" for doing that (since the Bible doesn't), but I would like to ask them, "Is this really what is best for your child, according to Scripture?"

One eyebrow-raising thing I found in this chapter is that once again Mrs. Pearl warns against women forming close relationships with other women:

There is a grave danger in becoming emotionally dependent on other women. Too many times I have seen this lead to something abnormal and sick.

(She does add, however, "Your husband and God should be the ones to whom you turn for emotional support and intimacy." That is true to an extent. I can't tell if she is condemning ALL close female friendships or just ones in which a women is foregoing an emotionally intimate relationship with her husband for one with a female friend.)

This chapter was convicting and encouraging for me personally. I struggle in this area since I'm not really a "kid person" by nature. I am passionate about children but don't have a natural "gift" to act out that passion. A few years back we were living in survival mode, and still today we are reaping the consequences of that. So I'm having to do a lot of backtracking, mending, and string-tying. I pray daily that the Lord would repay us for the years the locusts have eaten. :-)